Saturday, March 04, 2006

bad bad Jeannie

Okay, I'm being really really bad and stealing a little bit of time just for me to sit here and type. I know that there are at least 2dozen other things that I should be doing, or sorting, or unpacking, or fixing, or tending to but I will go back to the steady running pace that I've kept up for so long now as soon as I'm done typing. I have temporarily set the computer up on the kitchen counter because I haven't gotten a desk for it yet and there is only one phone jack that is working in the house right now but I *NEED* the excuse to sit still and do 'nothing'.

We are finished with the moving stuff from one house to the other part....that part of moving only took a day (that has to be a record for us). I think almost everyone we know in North Carolina showed up at our house with a truck to help move stuff!!! I've never had help moving like that and it shocked me kinda.....things sure did go fast though!! Now I seem to be stuck in the trying to get things out of boxes part of moving.....and to tell the truth it's a little depressing. We have just been so busy with all sorts of things that getting settled into our new home just isn't happening. What I have gotten done is what I have had to get done for everyone else....Troy's stuff so he can function for work, the kids stuff so they don't have an excuse to "lose" things, the kitchen stuff so that no one starves. For me I've only gotten unpacked a few changes of clothes and my medic bag just in case we need it. I love our new house and I'm so glad that we moved, I just can't wait to get moved in here and start living here....right now it just feels like a place where our stuff is stored and we sleep in between franctic spells of running around taking care of other stuff.

I'm sorry for complaining, it isn't something that I really do very often.....maybe I'm just tired, and unsettled, and a little frustrated, and very very very out of estrogen. I have to make it to a doctor's office this week and get a new prescription so that I don't have some sort of horrible hormonal episode and end up doing something really awful......like I don't know what but I do know that I haven't cried this much since I was pregnant with Caleb.

Things have been hectic.....we moved a week ago and haven't had one single day or evening to stay home and get anything done. Troy has been working 12 and 15 hour days and I'm wondering sometimes if he really exists or if he is really just a figment of my imagination. I'm beginning to feel a little overwhelmed with trying to do all of my work at home and all of his too. I wish I really was the superwoman that he seems to think I am sometimes.

I've been really worried about my two oldest kids who still live back in Missouri too. Jessi and her new baby are living kind of from place to place since the baby's daddy's mother evicted them from their apartment because she disagreed with Jess over something.....I know that sounds so 'soap opera' but that is the way Jessi's life seems to go sometimes. I hate the thought of the baby not having a real home right now and Jessi having to move around so much with a newborn and worrying isn't helping anything for either one of them but I don't know what else to do other than pray for her and I'm doing that. Joshua is doing okay.....he says....He is working A LOT and trying to finish his last year of high school. He sounds really stressed every time I've talked to him lately and I don't know if it's just 'stuff' or if he is really having trouble over something. I'm trying not to worry too much but that is really really really hard sometimes.

I'm also worrying myself silly over car trouble. I've been trying really hard to just take this kind of stuff as it comes but I am kind of tired of always working on a vehicle. Troy has been putting stuff off and putting it off......right now it's brakes, he has known for months that they needed replaced but there was always something else he would rather do and now the rotors have to be replaced too....so a job that would have only cost us $20 in parts is now costing us $75 and a whole lot more work. It's hard to not get irritated over it when he manages to always be ready to run do stuff for everyone else and spend every single saturday with the fellas but our own stuff that needs done gets put off to the point of being a real problem before it gets dealt with. I probably wouldn't obsess so much over this if we had more than one car on the road so that I could park the one needing the work until it got done. I have done alot of it myself but that seems to cause trouble too so I'm not sure what to do about it other than worry and pray.

Well, I've complained and fussed more than enough now on my little bit of stolen time so I guess it's bye bye for now and I promise to be back to my normal self next time.

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