The last few weeks have been quite the roller coaster around here. I'm still struggling with some health issues but I guess that is to be expected. We are trying to find a doctor that has some understanding of the disorder that I have, so far none that we've talked to or met with seem to (even though they seem to think they do). The terrible headaches are still hanging around, along with the dizziness and fainting and falling easily.
Things like that just going on and on and on tend to be kind of discouraging. Today didn't start off as one of the best days either. I went to bed last night feeling bad and woke up feeling worse. Then we got the mail, and went through the bills, and sat down with the calendar and the checkbook, and by the end of that I was in tears and on the verge of falling into a serious pit of worrying. The medical bills are stacking up, the income just keeps on growing less and less, and I was truly tempted to just sit down today and fret myself to bits over the whole mess.
I ended up just going to my room for awhile and prayed. After a little bit I felt a lot better and went on with the day, it was time to get the kid's afternoon lessons done and I had chores stacked up neck deep waiting for me. We read a portion of the Bible and discuss it the first thing after lunch and Troy goes to work.....so today it was Psalm 34.
1 I will bless the LORD at all times: his praise shall continually be in my mouth.
2 My soul shall make her boast in the LORD: the humble shall hear thereof, and be glad.
3 O magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt his name together.
4 I sought the LORD, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.
5 They looked unto him, and were lightened: and their faces were not ashamed.
6 This poor man cried, and the LORD heard him, and saved him out of all his troubles.
7 The angel of the LORD encampeth round about them that fear him, and delivereth them.
8 O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him.
9 O fear the LORD, ye his saints: for there is no want to them that fear him.
10 The young lions do lack, and suffer hunger: but they that seek the LORD shall not want any good thing.
11 Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the LORD.
12 What man is he that desireth life, and loveth many days, that he may see good?
13 Keep thy tongue from evil, and thy lips from speaking guile.
14 Depart from evil, and do good; seek peace, and pursue it.
15 The eyes of the LORD are upon the righteous, and his ears are open unto their cry.
16 The face of the LORD is against them that do evil, to cut off the remembrance of them from the earth.
17 The righteous cry, and the LORD heareth, and delivereth them out of all their troubles.
18 The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.
19 Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the LORD delivereth him out of them all.
20 He keepeth all his bones: not one of them is broken.Evil shall slay the wicked: and they that hate the righteous shall be desolate.
21 The LORD redeemeth the soul of his servants: and none of them that trust in him shall be desolate.
As I looked at my Bible and read just the first few verses my eyes filled with tears of thanksgiving. I can't count the times that I've turned to the Lord for help or for comfort or for deliverance from one thing or another and HE has NEVER FAILED. I read in this passage of His deliverance from troubles, fear, and affliction....and every time it talks of it here it says "all". ALL.... I don't guess that leaves out any! I'm so thankful that I have God's Holy Word, for the way it feeds my soul, for the way it comforts me when I'm hurting, for the assurance it gives me when I'm afraid, for the peace it gives me in troubled times, and for the joy that bubbles up from deep within my soul in response to it!
By the time we finished reading that Psalm my 3 kids were so excited they were drumming their feet at the table like they were running in place. Fred was just glowing and writing as fast as she could, Jared was making notes in the margins and then his notebook all while grinning ear to ear with tears on his cheeks, and Caleb just held his Bible as close to his chest as he could get it without putting it in his shirt and just glowed in his quiet way. I'm so thankful that it meant something not only to me, but that it moved the kids too.
What a blessing we found today just by being faithful to read the Bible! I wish I were able to describe it more, or better, or to somehow impart to you how it felt to read those sweet Holy words and know that they applied to me. There just isn't a sweeter feeling than knowing that the Creator of the World loves me enough to mean those words for me! I just had to share.......